I had not seen him for 3 weeks. I did a short count, and it was just over three weeks. He had missed me, I could tell. He wanted to know where I was headed, I told him San Diego and he wanted to know whom I was going with.
For a man who did not interact with any of my friends, he surely knows a lot about them, or of them. I tell him everything. When I saw him, I naturally wanted to go down on him which he later would comment that many women did not like that. I used to wonder about how many women he's been with while dating me, but now it did not matter. I knew that he would date and that dating others would not result in the same outcome.
Surely enough, he told me that for some reason we are a perfect physical match, he finds me beautiful, that he will never meet anyone like me, not even close, is what he said to me. I think I believe him, there is no reason for him to lie about something like this. He has me. He knows that I love him. There is no reason to tell me all these things to keep me around. I'm around. He knows that too. He tells me these insanely romantic things because he loves me. He says that he likes being with me, my nakedness against his. He wanted to take me to go somewhere, in May. I think he will make it happen because I think on an annual basis he likes the idea of going away and having me there with him.
He shows me photos of him when he was a baby. I took a photo and he did not like it. I told him that it's for me and me only. One day he'll be old and I want to take care of him. And I want a photo of him when he was a baby. His mother made that baby book for him, written in German. She was a very Germanic woman, Bavarian, and I like my Bavarian man just so.
We laid in bed after he fucked me. As usual he tells me things. I liked that. I used to have so much anxiety around him. Last September was when it peaked. Then by January of this year I was finally to feel a sense of peace.
When I think of him, and wish that I could be with him, my eyes well up.
When we talked hypothetically if we were together, I told him that I might get bored. "Then you'd find another guy. I'd have to find a girlfriend. I don't want to find another girlfriend." He did not like that idea very much.
Today he told me that no one will ever love me as much as he loves me. I asked him why and he said because I know you so well. I know you the most.
I WILL NEVER MEET ANYONE LIKE YOU AGAIN. NOT EVEN CLOSE.
He said. He does love me and I know it now more than ever.
It's not the love one would experience day to day. But it's the only ever lasting love I've ever felt.
I told him imagine a day we'd be together. Finally. Be together. He could not imagine that. He just likes to spend time with me, from time to time. I want to spend time with him, day in and day out. Take care of him. Be his one and only.
You know how much this really hurts? I want to tell him that while he loves me, I fucking get heart torn out with the thought of him not with me. I HAVE NEVER LOVED ANYONE FOR THIS LONG.
Imagine a love affair of a life time. I once saw a girl whom he was affiliated with holding a sign that says "I want a love affair of a lifetime." She did not get that from him, sadly, he loves someone like me, but I think I might have stumbled onto the love affair of a lifetime.
Now all I could really do, is to walk away.
For a man who did not interact with any of my friends, he surely knows a lot about them, or of them. I tell him everything. When I saw him, I naturally wanted to go down on him which he later would comment that many women did not like that. I used to wonder about how many women he's been with while dating me, but now it did not matter. I knew that he would date and that dating others would not result in the same outcome.
Surely enough, he told me that for some reason we are a perfect physical match, he finds me beautiful, that he will never meet anyone like me, not even close, is what he said to me. I think I believe him, there is no reason for him to lie about something like this. He has me. He knows that I love him. There is no reason to tell me all these things to keep me around. I'm around. He knows that too. He tells me these insanely romantic things because he loves me. He says that he likes being with me, my nakedness against his. He wanted to take me to go somewhere, in May. I think he will make it happen because I think on an annual basis he likes the idea of going away and having me there with him.
He shows me photos of him when he was a baby. I took a photo and he did not like it. I told him that it's for me and me only. One day he'll be old and I want to take care of him. And I want a photo of him when he was a baby. His mother made that baby book for him, written in German. She was a very Germanic woman, Bavarian, and I like my Bavarian man just so.
We laid in bed after he fucked me. As usual he tells me things. I liked that. I used to have so much anxiety around him. Last September was when it peaked. Then by January of this year I was finally to feel a sense of peace.
When I think of him, and wish that I could be with him, my eyes well up.
When we talked hypothetically if we were together, I told him that I might get bored. "Then you'd find another guy. I'd have to find a girlfriend. I don't want to find another girlfriend." He did not like that idea very much.
Today he told me that no one will ever love me as much as he loves me. I asked him why and he said because I know you so well. I know you the most.
I WILL NEVER MEET ANYONE LIKE YOU AGAIN. NOT EVEN CLOSE.
He said. He does love me and I know it now more than ever.
It's not the love one would experience day to day. But it's the only ever lasting love I've ever felt.
I told him imagine a day we'd be together. Finally. Be together. He could not imagine that. He just likes to spend time with me, from time to time. I want to spend time with him, day in and day out. Take care of him. Be his one and only.
You know how much this really hurts? I want to tell him that while he loves me, I fucking get heart torn out with the thought of him not with me. I HAVE NEVER LOVED ANYONE FOR THIS LONG.
Imagine a love affair of a life time. I once saw a girl whom he was affiliated with holding a sign that says "I want a love affair of a lifetime." She did not get that from him, sadly, he loves someone like me, but I think I might have stumbled onto the love affair of a lifetime.
Now all I could really do, is to walk away.
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