She's decided, that her heart is a very fragile thing and that to stay on the surface is the only mode of survival. She and E meet every Tuesday, every Tuesday or Thursday night they go out for dinner, a drink or both, and sometimes they have sex. It's been a year. E does not get to her but E gets her.
E reads every post she puts on social media site and E asks her about her life and remembers everything she tells him. They have been going on for a year, on occasion, they see each other once a week, and other times, once a month. They don't make a fuss, their relationship is not complicated. They like each other. E likes her and thinks she's very sexy. They take turns paying for the bill. They talk about work and their friends. They talk about their respective spouses. E is very successful corporate guy but a hipster. E is cool, and someone whom she'd consider marry, if he and she were both available. E does things like going to Burning Man, Lightening in A Bottle, Silent Disco and night clubs. E likes to cook and eat out. She does not love E or think about E but she and E have a great time together.
E loves to watch baseball and is an A's fan. She says over dinner, "I like to watch a game, sometimes." E says, "Great. I'll get us some tickets. We'll see an A's game this summer or two." E looks up places for them to go and eat and play.
When she travels E writes to her or follows her on FaceBook. When she gets heart broken by other men she eats dinner with E and cries on E's shoulder. E does not know that she has many men that she date but E knows that she is with many men, platonically. E would not mind one way or another, but she knows better to stir up the pot.
"I'm leaving again next week." She casually tells E.
"You said that you'd stay put for the next month." He's not unhappy but just surprised.
"I can see you next week, before I go." She says.
"I leave for Lightening In a Bottle on the 11th." He has told her the dates but she forgets easily.
"That's the start of Burning Man events." He adds.
"Sure." She does not remember such things because she's losing her memory.
"I'm moving." She says.
"So soon?" He asks.
"Yes. I'm leaving this country." She's looking forward to leaving here, this continent. She's able to do that, she's worked hard enough and she's saved.
"You can visit me. There. In Burgundy." She says.
"You will learn French. You'll take on a French lover." He pictures her in a white sundress, and her hair tied back, and she's drinking a glass of chilled wine and she's speaking in French, murmuring, and she's the exotic one out, because she's got dark hair, olive skin, and she's got that smile that melts his heart. She's foreign, she's going to be foreign wherever she goes.
"Maybe. Maybe not. I don't like Frenchmen. I like Scandinavians." She says.
That's true. E is Scandinavian. Blond, blue eyes, tall, Swedish.
"I like blond hair men with blue eyes. You know that." She squeezes his thighs, which are touching hers.
They sit in the bar area of a red hot restaurant where excellent rib eye steak is being brought over to their table.
It's a really good meal. A meal filled with good wine, great conversation and a pair of people who know what they are to each other, no drama, no complications, no sense of agony over what-does-it-mean.
"I'll come and visit you. I'll rent your place when you are not there." E says enthusiastically E travels a lot internationally. He's her equal. In more than one ways.
"You'd better come. Visit me. My four bedrooms and two bath house." She is now watching the TV screen where A's is playing the Cardinals.
E has traveled to many places in the world. He could have been her soul mate. If it is not for the fact that they met 15 years too late.
"There are these private spas for rent. We can meet there next time." He says to her.
"Sure, I'd like that. But I also want to try this other restaurant. State Bird Provisions. It's hot and hard to get in. But we can try. They reserve 1/3 of the seating for walk ins. We may get lucky." She has been trying to go there for ages.
At some point in a relationship, an affair or not, people become human beings. No longer lusty, no longer intense emotions, just companionship. She does not know if they are at that stage or not, but she knows that he is always going to be there. He's nearly a decade younger but they get along just as well. When she's younger, she's never pictured herself dating anyone younger than she. At her midlife, she's starting to realize that age is just a number. When you feel in sync with someone you are in sync.
A year has passed. This is a man she has always turned to when things are not always alright. This is a man who is going to stay in her life.
For better or for worse. He' s here to stay.
This is not a love story, but as we all know, love stories are short lived and overrated.
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